I have changed my mind again

I don't know why I can't make a decision these days. We began the co-op a coupld of weeks ago, and now I have decided (with the help of my husband) that is it not for us, at least not this year. I think I under estimated how difficult it would be for me having two toddlers of my own, to keep the toddler class all day. I came home on Monday feeling like I got hit by a truck. I am almost fully recovered two days later.

I am really struggling with why God allows me to make these pretty big decisions and then seems to show me that I made the wrong one. Is it character building or is it flakiness? I really don't think I am wimping out but in the back of my mind, I feel like I am. I am blessed to have this older child who is VERY go with the flow and doesn't skip a beat with my decision changes. I hope that the Lord sanctifies me enough in the next few years that I have a better handle on things when Madison gets older. She is definitely NOT as go with the flow as Mackenzie.

Anyway I keep wondering is this part of being an adult or is that I can think clearly anymore.

I was pondering this as I was talking to the man from My Father's World for the third time today. My Father's World is the curriculum that I bought in May for homeschooling, after much time spent researching curriculums and talking with my husband. Then when we got accepted to the co-op, they were doing different material so I wanted to exchange my material for something that would be more suited to go along with co-op. So I called him up and he said I would be able to do that but to think on it and make sure it's what i wanted to do. So last week I finally made my decision to return it and called him up again to let him know I was sending it. He got the package on Friday. On Monday evening we decided we were not doing the co-op. So I was just going to let it ride and do what I had already committed to doing with the exchange. Then he called today to get more info and I mentioned that I had decided against the co-op. So I have now paid $30 to ship my curriculum that I purchased in May (saving on shipping because I bought it at a curriculum fair) back and forth to MO twice. That was a real way to save some $$.